A new national survey suggests that while many Americans turn to friends and family when facing emotional difficulties, most feel their loved ones are unable to provide the support they truly need. The findings highlight a gap between informal emotional support and the benefits of professional mental health care.
Friends and Family Are the First Call — But Often Can’t Help
In a poll of 2,000 adults, nearly half reported reaching out to friends or relatives when overwhelmed. Yet two-thirds of those who disclosed their mental health concerns said the person they confided in ultimately could not help them cope.
About one-third said the individual they approached was dealing with their own challenges, and one-quarter felt the person simply did not understand what they were going through. These limitations may reflect the emotional strain many households are experiencing, as well as the absence of specialized training among non-professionals.
Feeling Like a Burden Limits Openness
Although one-third of respondents seek emotional support at least once a week, the majority carry significant hesitation. Seventy-four percent worry they are burdening others, and that fear has kept nearly seven in 10 from speaking up altogether.
This reluctance, researchers note, can delay help-seeking and potentially worsen symptoms over time. Even when loved ones encourage someone to pursue therapy — which nearly half of respondents said they experienced — one in five still do not follow through.
Barriers to Seeking Professional Support
Affordability remains the most frequently cited obstacle to accessing mental health care, with 44 percent of respondents saying cost prevents them from pursuing therapy. Another 29 percent believe they can manage their mental health concerns on their own.
However, the most common barrier was difficulty finding the “right” therapist. Three-quarters of participants said this challenge prevented them from initiating care. Even among those who did start therapy, 32 percent reported struggling to find a provider who was a good fit. As a result, 74 percent skipped sessions or stopped therapy entirely.
Importance of the Therapist-Client Match
The survey was commissioned by BetterHelp to coincide with the launch of its Therapist Match Commitment, an initiative designed to improve client-therapist alignment. Fernando Madeira, president of the company, said the data underscores how well-intentioned personal support networks often cannot substitute for clinical expertise.
“Loved ones can offer compassion, but many people lack the training needed to help someone manage complex emotional challenges,” Madeira said. He warned that mismatched therapeutic relationships can discourage individuals from seeking help again, even when they might benefit from continued care.
BetterHelp reports that most of its clients experience symptom improvement within approximately 12 weeks. Madeira emphasized that finding an appropriate therapist — someone whose communication style, clinical approach, and expertise align with a client’s needs — can significantly influence long-term engagement and outcomes.
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